If you saw my Instagram stories on Saturday, then you know I had what I dubbed ‘Mom’s Mini Day Out’. Basically, it was a few hours all to myself (with the hubs watching little one, of course) to relax, reset and recharge. When I got home, it was noticeable how much better I felt. I was excited for the day, in an overall better mood, my body felt less tense, and I was more patient. Overall I was a better mom and better wife for taking the few hours to myself!
If you’d asked me prior to Saturday if me-time was important, I would have answered yes, but truthfully I wouldn’t have had anything to base that off of. Since Beckett was born (16 MONTHS AGO YOU ALL!!! Where has time gone?!), I’ve really really struggled with mom guilt. If you are someone who doesn’t believe mom guilt is a real thing, I invite you to my house to which I will show you just how real it is.
For 16 months, I’ve made Beckett my top priority. Her meals, her play, her learning, her care…whatever she needed came first and foremost. As a result, I was exhausted and I had serious struggles with finding time for myself. You guys know this…I mean, I didn’t write on here for months! I felt guilty leaving her to shower (even when she was with Joe!), felt guilty not playing and teaching her every spare second of my day, felt guilty for enjoying myself on the rare chance she wasn’t attached to my hip. Truthfully, my mind was a mess, my body was in pain and I was just exhausted overall.
Evidently it was clear to Joe that I was in need of a break, as he surprised me with a massage on Saturday and I can’t thank him enough for forcing me out of the house. I woke up Saturday morning and he was practically pushing me out the door (he knows I would stay home given the chance), but I’m so glad he did. The masseuse told me that was body was pretty tense (shocker!) and that was skin was so dry she used an entire bottle of oil during my massage (#fail). So lesson learned ladies – take care of yourselves! It doesn’t have to be anything elaborate or extravagant – just put yourself, and your health first. I promise your spouse and/or children will be SO glad that did!
If you need a little help figuring out how to relax, reset, and recharge then here are 15 tips to help:
- Go for a walk
Every time I go for a walk, I make a conscious effort to appreciate the beauty around me as my child does when we go on walks. The littlest things make her so happy – the dog across the street, the wind tickling her face, the sounds of cars or the butterfly that passes. The world from the eyes of a child is truly magical, and it’s something adults are often too jaded to appreciate.
- Take a bath
Prior to Beckett, I did this all the time. Now the only time I get one is if she’s in the tub with me! To me, there’s something so relaxing about breaking open a bath bomb, filling the tub with warm water and just sitting starring at the water.
- Get a massage
Here’s another prime example of something I did all the time prior to the birth of my child, and I haven’t done it once since she’s been born (until this past Saturday, of course!). It was nice to get some of the built-up tension out of my muscles, and it forced me to put my phone down and relax for an hour.
- Invest in little things that make you happy
This is actually one I do really well! Over the course of the last year, I’ve been really good about finding ways to enjoy mundane tasks more, like cleaning and laundry. I’ve been buying Mrs. Meyers Multi-Surface Cleaner in different seasonal scents (currently loving Mum and Apple Cider) because it makes cleaning around the house exciting since these sprays smell amazing! Also, I recently caved and bought The Laundress laundry detergent because it smells so so good and makes my clothes so soft. It’s the little things people!
- Find a hobby
Joe telling me to get a hobby is exactly the reason I started this blog and everyday I’m glad that I did! I love writing and connecting with each of you! It clears my mind and gives me purpose aside from being a wife and mother. I’ve also recently really taken up photography and while I’m still in the beginning stages, I really love and get so excited when I capture something magical!
- Take up something new
Speaking of hobbies – take up something new. Like a cooking class, or tennis lessons. Just put yourself out there!
- Ask for help
Asking for help is my nemesis. I struggle so much asking for help, because truthfully I feel like I failed when I need help. In my mind, I should be able to do everything, and google or research anything else. I’m constantly reminding myself that it’s okay to need help and that by needing help doesn’t mean I did something wrong.
- Light candles
This goes back to the little things in life. I love candles, so sometimes when I just need a quick reset on life, I light one of my favorite candles (really love this one!) and take a few deep breaths.
- Enjoy a meal alone
This probably sounds so stupid, but after having a child I rarely eat alone (and sometimes, I don’t eat at all). I’m always just trying to eat when I’m feeding her (usually leftovers of whatever she’s eating), or I’m eating as fast as I can while I’m doing a thousand other things. Recently I’ve been putting a solid effort to having at least one meal a week, in which I sit at the table (or in a restaurant), by myself and enjoy my meal in peace.
- Always eat dessert
I’m such a huge proponent of eating dessert! I feel like the more we deprive ourselves of things we want, the more we crave and when/if we give into those cravings, it’s so much worse than if you just ate a little dessert the first time you wanted it. I mean kudos to the people who hate sweets, but I eat some form of dessert every single day. Sometimes it’s just a Hersey kiss or two (or three), sometimes it’s ice cream and sometimes it’s just adding whipped cream to my coffee. But so long as I have dessert in moderation, I will never deprive myself of it. You only live once, and damn it – I’m eating dessert!
- Drink tea before bed
I like to drink a cup of tea before bed. It doesn’t happen nearly as often as I’d like, but if I had the energy, I’d drink a cup every night before bed. Last week, I was truthfully exhausted! So much so, I made some mint tea and rather than sitting downstairs watching TV with Joe and drinking my tea, I decided to take my cup upstairs and I sat in bed, drank my tea and decompressed from what has been a busy few months. As a result, I slept like an absolute baby! Drink tea ladies….specifically tea in bed!
- Get a mani/pedi
This isn’t something I’ve done for myself since before I got married, as I usually just paint my nails at home. But so many women swear by regular manis and pedis that I felt I needed to add it to this list. Leave the hubby with the kids and hit up the nail salon for some cuticles, color and clear mind!
- Buy a nice robe/comfy lounge clothes
I work from home 3 days out of the week, and so recently I decided to get this really nice robe and some really comfy lounge clothes. It just makes such a difference! Soft, warm, cozy clothes for home are just heavenly and it’s so much better being stressed out and comfortable, rather than just stressed out.
- The Slip Pillowcase
Talk about beauty rest! There’s nothing like a few extra Zzzz’s to really help you reset, but a few extra Zzzz’s on the Slip Pillowcase? Um, yes please!
- Stay off social media
There’s nothing like having a few minutes to yourself, and then all of a sudden you get sucked down the social media rabbit hole. You spend all the time you were supposed to be using to relax, by getting wound up, playing comparison between you and every other person on social media. Uffff! When I really want to reset, I stay off social media. I also (and you guys already know this) make it a point to take one day a week off from posting on social media because it helps me recharge, and focus on family.